Factory Joke Thread – November 2025

Angela did you see this thread?

http://www.poi-factory.com/node/54720

President Harry S, Truman once said he wanted an economist who was one-hander. WHY?
Because his economic advisors would typically give him economic advice stating. "On the other hand... And on the other...?

~Angela

Didn't work, as he still had bear feet.

Police have confirmed that the man who tragically fell from the outdoor patio of an eighteenth floor nightclub was not a Bouncer.

I guess I couldn't see that well.

A man walked into a bar, sat down, and ordered a beer. As he sipped the beer, he heard a soothing voice say “nice tie!” Looking around, he noticed that the bar was empty except for himself and the bartender at the end of the bar. A few sips later, the voice said “beautiful shirt“. At this, the man called the bartender over. “Hey…I must be losing my mind,” he told the bartender. “I keep hearing these voices saying nice things, and there’s not a soul in here but us.” “It’s the peanuts,” answered the bartender. “Say what?” “You heard me,” said the barkeep. “It’s the peanuts … they’re complimentary.“

A male whale and a female whale were swimming off the coast of Japan when they noticed a whaling ship. The male whale recognized it as the same ship that had harpooned his father many years earlier.
He said to the female whale, "Lets both swim under the ship and blow out of our air holes at the same time and it should cause the ship to turn over and sink." They tried it and sure enough, the ship turned over and quickly sank.
Soon however, the whales realized the sailors had jumped overboard and were swimming to the safety of shore. The male was enraged that they were going to get away and told the female, "Let's swim after them and gobble them up before they reach the shore.
" At this point, he realized the female was becoming reluctant to follow him. Look", she said, "I went along with the blow job, but I absolutely refuse to swallow the seamen."

The Old West smelled like leather, dust… and outhouses.

Cowboys didn’t just use them, they hung out in them. The outhouse was part confession booth, part comedy club, part survival challenge.

Carvings on the walls told stories: poker losses, love declarations, mysterious tallies labeled “Beans Eaten.”

In summer, it was 110 degrees. In winter, you needed a lasso to pull yourself out of the frost. Snakes occasionally joined the lineup. But the cowboys persevered, because nature waits for no man, no matter how tough his hat looks.

They say legends were born in saloons. We say some were born in outhouses.

But after looking through her knicker drawer and finding a nurse's outfit, a French maid's outfit, and a policewoman's uniform, I finally decided: if she can't hold down a job, she's not for me.

A guy walks into the bar and says to the bartender "I'll have a rum and Coke."

The bartender asks "Is Pepsi ok?" The guy says "Sure."

Bartender says "one Pepsi and Coke, coming right up."

The Cop Pulled Over The Old Lady But Wasn’t Expecting Her Excuse

A Highway Patrol Officer pulled over a little old lady for going 10mph on the highway.

As he walked up to the old lady’s car he noticed there were 3 other elderly folks looking very frightened and rigid.

He leaned down to the old lady’s window and noticed she was as calm as could be.

“Do you know why I pulled you over, Ma’am?”

“No, I do not,” she replied sweetly.

“You were going 10mph on the highway. That’s a serious hazard for other drivers.”

The officer couldn’t help but glance at the three terrified passengers.

The little old lady pointed at the sign nearby. “Isn’t the speed limit 10?”

The officer looked at the sign and laughed.
“Ma’am, that’s the sign telling you which highway you’re on. Interstate 10.”

The little old lady burst out in a fit of giggles. “Oh, I’m sorry!”

The officer decided it was an honest mistake and was going to let her go.
But curiosity got the better of him. “Can I ask why your passengers are so scared?”

The little old lady laughed again. “Probably because I just got off Interstate 175.”

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you started eating chips...

But Timmy doesn't want to eat his broccoli.

- Eat your broccoli! - says the mother.

- No! - exclaims Little Timmy it smells weird.

The father then leans toward the boy and with a mischievous look in his eye, whispers something in his ear.

Little Timmy quickly eats his broccoli and goes into his room.

- What did you tell him?

- I told him that if he didn't eat his broccoli, his 'sausage' wouldn't grow.

The woman then stands up and slaps her husband as hard as she can.

- What was that for? - he asks, confused.

- FOR NOT EATING YOUR BROCCOLI WHEN YOU WERE A KID!

I'm not saying my parents were tight growing up, but every December we became Jehovah's Witnesses for a month.

......is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

Love means nothing to them.

Q: What's the best way to make a small fortune in the stock market?

A: Start off with a large fortune.

Write for free help.

Wow

Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met.
After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding.
Their life together was, of course, perfect.

One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple were driving their perfect car (a Grand Caravan) along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple, they
stopped to help.

There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along
delivering the toys.

Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them survived the accident.

Who was the survivor? (Read down for the answer.)
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The perfect woman survived. She's the only one who really existed in the first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man.

****Women stop reading here, that is the end of the joke.

Men read on.
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So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the perfect woman must have been driving. This explains why there was a car accident.

By the way, if you're a woman and you're reading this, this illustrates another point: women never listen either.

Walking up behind her he says: "Hi there, beautiful... How's it going?"

Having already downed a few power drinks, she turned around, faced him, looked him straight in the eye and said, "Listen here good looking, I screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place, in the car, front door, back door, on the ground, standing up, sitting down, naked or with clothes on, dirty, clean... it doesn't matter to me. I've been doing it ever since I got out of college and I just love it."

Eyes now wide with interest, he responded,

"No kidding. I'm a lawyer too. What firm are you with?"